The Force against LOVE
There are things that we learn as we grow up. A few of them are the traditions that anchor our existence. The myths that seep into our roots and bud out as rituals we follow so closely. During setting rules for the generations to come, we forget the basic needs of a human. We forget that our lives matter more than a few chains that pull us down. We matter more than what is expected of us. A lucky few are self-aware to understand this, and let themselves grow unrestricted. Unrestricted from whatever the world paints for them as right or wrong. Free from all anxiety and paranoia that following the ‘righteous path’ carries.
A big part of this rebellious nature is learning to love. To love one’s self without a shred of hate or doubt. To love the colour of the sky on a clear sunny day, to love the feeling of joy when you take a walk in the rain. But a special feeling it is to fall in love with someone. In love with another human being so much that you feel better about yourself when you are with them. You write songs and sonnets for them, the little things they do make you smile when they aren’t around, and you appreciate their flaws like it’s one of their biggest strengths.
Oh! How beautiful is this feeling. But the regressive nature of the society we live in, we Indians specifically, distorts the beauty of this feeling and transform it into something ugly with horrific repercussions. It is saddening how something that natural is termed as a sin. The problem is perhaps the fact that people burden themselves with the responsibility of fixing a broken society.
Growing up we were hushed when we asked questions about sex, sexuality, gender discrimination or any other major issues at hand. Why? Because the minute you ask questions you see how illogical the norms we follow are.
So they labelled these topics as taboo and tried to keep us in line like sheep. A rebel in love is a powerful force though, it isn’t something they can hush or ignore. In fact, it is a threat to all the cages they have built for us over the years, to them it is a threat of losing out on their nonsensical beliefs.
So they –the Moral police, start to panic as they lose control. So they assume the sole responsibility to prevent the human mind from living outside the box.
One such occasion where our Moral Police Officers work overtime is Valentine’s Day. The day of celebration of love. Granted it is a custom that didn’t originate in India, the feeling the custom celebrates is the same regardless of nationality, gender, race or religion. The day a lot of us express our love to that special one.
It is the day of Lovers. What is the harm here? You buy each other gifts, enjoy each other’s company and remind each other of how much you care . If it isn’t hurting anyone then why can’t one celebrate it? What is this evil that the society is trying to wall out? Is it the free will to love?!
Evil is described as profoundly immoral and wicked. What is wicked about feeling deeply about another human being and being in a consensual relationship with them? Is taking the society’s consent important here? Definitely not. This is turning into a competition of killing individuality.
Why do we need someone to check what is right and wrong for us, to police us, to reprimand us? Why cannot adults freely celebrate a holiday much like any other without having to hide the gifts they receive from their family? Should we only celebrate a holiday if it is religious?
So many questions in the angry mind of an Indian, so strong the will to fight oppression in the name of Morals.
A huge part of who we are is associated with our nationality or the religion we choose to follow. Is religion to be drawn into every aspect of our life? Religion is faith, it is often a feeling of spirituality. It isn’t something that is open for everyone to comment and add on to. But that is what people keep doing.
Our past has thought us that if we Indians join hands together and fight evil forces no matter how huge and powerful they are, we are invincible. We put everything on the line to save our identity; no matter what our religion or individual believes were, we fought together, and we won our country back from the colossal British rule. So if we keep our differences aside, we can save our country from drowning the souls who are in love.
Our country is progressing each day. With movements like #MeToo and Feminism inspiring us, it is important we leave behind the regressive culture that defined the generations before us. Let us build a country that is open to love and affection. Let us nurture an environment that is accepting. This is healthy, this is important!
Love can take any form it wishes to take, and the society needs to step back and let it evolve on its own without supervision or interference. With a safe environment to express your feelings, you wouldn’t have to learn to suppress who you are. This helps you become a better version of yourself, a version that can add more value to the world we live in.
So let go of what the Moral police and the regressive society of the past has tried to teach you. Learn to love and let others love freely! Learn to respect privacy and individuality! Learn to understand consent better. Learn that each individual has their own integrity and dignity that you need to appreciate. Learn because if we stop learning, we stop growing, we stop living. And with each barbaric notion that held us back before in the name of customs is unlearned and let go of, we can together learn that we can make a society that is a happy place for each of its members.
It’s a long way to go but Valentine’s Day, 2019 can perhaps mark the day when we Indians learned to love each other, and we made a better country out of the one that was given to us by ‘them’.
Written bySabah Batul
Sabah Batul is a journalism student currently living in Bangalore. Her journey as a writer began in her English class as she was forced to write an essay. Soon she fell in love with writing and deeply enjoyed birthing characters and stories through the tip of her pen. Sabah also enjoys writing poetry to make sense of the chaos around her. Her Instagram @sabah_on_paper is a raw description of her deepest thoughts. Apart from writing she is a proud Potter head, who claims to be the lost Winchester sister and is also supporting Tyrion Lannister to sit on the Iron Throne next.